Now, on to the meat of my musings here today...
Tomorrow, I hop on a train heading for Chicago. Once there, I am willingly submitting myself into the care of a surgeon who will, I hope, manage to remove and reshape aspects of my face to something else. That from that day forward, I can then look in the mirror and stop seeing a male face staring back at me. I also desperately want to have the people who know me from before to stop looking at me and only seeing who I was; just seeing the old me, only now in girl clothes. I want to be able to walk down the street and any stares I get, not come from people looking at the guy in a dress. I want that security in my gender presentation that will allow me to get on and over this part, this aspect, of my life - to be able to get on with the process of living my life finally.
But it is also something more than that I think.
( Silly whining and trangst...Collapse )